Spiritus is an album that moves between many different sounds, ambient to beat-driven, drifting to driving; what would you say is the thing that defines the album as a whole, sonically?
Spiritus is about a world of deep emotion, sonic storylines moving through complex emotions in love and nostalgia, recounting vivid dreams, nightmares, and transcendent beauty.—the nudges of intuition, the resonance of memory, and the sacred space between the physical and spiritual worlds. It’s a sonic walk through historical moments in my life, forgotten letters that came to life, and haunting dreams that I recounted to process the complex breadth of emotion we as humans work through in love, life, and tragedy.
As a whole, some listeners will be able to thread together a cinematic-like movie soundtrack of an arc of a love story and the stories within that movie arc. It’s certainly an immersive album, and if you can listen to it with full devotion, like watching a movie for an hour, some listeners are sharing spiritual experiences and deep emotional feelings surfacing after. That could be the thing, too, that unexpectedly rewards the listener sonically and emotionally.
Is there a theme or message that runs through these songs or dialogue you want to start with the listener?
Spiritus is a mixture of walking between reality and dream state, the subconscious, conscious, and trauma while searching for meaning and healing in complex emotions of love, loss, grief, etc. There’s also an element of a cinematic storyline throughout the sounds too: the pop synthwave UK garage beats start out the album, and then it weaves into this psychological reckoning of a relationship storyline that starts with really sweet memories, you know, and then acceptance of the journey of heartache and love that sort of brings us a reprieve in “Crossed Our Hearts.” But then the feeling goes out of body in “Let’s Go To The Moon”, and within a blink of an eye the psyche and voice are pulled into this really sorrowful, grieving of recounted nightmares from long-lost loves gone wrong.
And finally, at the end of the album, you find this sort of exploration of peace or acceptance, and if you let your soul go to those places sonically, well, I’m guessing your nervous system gets reset and sort of has to hyper-focus almost on the album to absorb that wide range of intense poetry and production which can be profoundly healing. I’d really love it if the listener asked themselves when listening to the album, “What am I seeing, feeling, hearing, experiencing in my soul at this moment, and do any memories or images come up?”
Please tell me a bit about the journey that has brought you to where we find you today, and perhaps reveal some of your influences, both musically and otherwise.
A: Well, I was born an artist and painter, and just really loved art. I spent my younger years being a fine artist and making copious amounts of artwork. I also came from a musical family and an artistic one, so there were threads of art and music surrounding me from a young age. I’d hear my father play the cello and violin, as well as the classical guitar, and my mother played the piano or flute. It was a cacophony of art and sound and something I’ll always cherish. I studied fine art – painting at university and did some studies in piano, flute, and classical guitar, and had a brief stint at The Portland Symphonic Girlchoir, along with singing hymns since I was five every week. I guess at Vespers is when I really started getting interested in singing as a form of ritual, reverence etc. And I think that influences my work today. I got into reading music quite a bit in college and veered into wanting to compose music but didn’t pick it up again until a few years out of college.
My music career started later than most nowadays, but when it started, it was like, hey, I’m here, and now I’m going to be a prolific electronic producer. I had a friend who was really into music production, and he encouraged me to try it out. And lastly, I found a really deep love for writing and writing poetry. I guess I got to a point where I wanted to speak about my thoughts more than just through sound, so I started writing songs and composing for them. Spritius and Halo were the first two albums that really explored that fully. Early influences were all the Baroque, classical works that wafted through our home in my childhood, Segovia, U2, Spiritualized, psychedelic Rock, 70’s rock, obscure industrial and indie music I’d find in Seattle’s music stores, all the great composers, Chopin, Beethoven, Mozart, and contemporary composers Yan Tiersen, fine artists like Edward Hopper, Degas, Monet, Renoir, DeKooning, Cy Twombly, my father’s record collection of Janis Joplin, The Moody Blues, The Beatles, Enya and so many more especially obscure folk bands.
Do you see making music as different from any other artistic paths you pursue, and if so, what sets the various disciplines apart?
With painting, it’s an internally rewarding process where you know only one person in the world will buy that painting and enjoy it for the rest of your life, and you wake up painting knowing this, trusting the universe that one human will find your painting and buy it and have a connection with it no one else has. Compared to music where everyone can enjoy it and listen to the song, it’s sort of strange to take that for granted, you know? As a painter, I think one person is a huge win if they love your art. But to have 100 who listen to your music daily? Being a painter kept me humble, learning to create 100’s of pieces of artwork without an audience back in the day and maybe only 12 people seeing your art over a decade in a private showing or a small gallery that got so emotionally connected to the art they either purchased the piece or had a conversation with you about it, that’s a totally different experience. And I’m grateful for it; it’s helped me forge through hundreds of songs, some other great musicians may question and be like why did you release that?
Well, for a painter, you share your early art and your later art, and we know the early works become revered later on in life. So, I guess it’s different to share my earlier songs so freely that they were clearly at a novice level. But I don’t mind; I like that progression. The dichotomy between fine art and music exists in other measures, too, but this is the one I think of the most.
How has your music, and perhaps your approach to making it, changed in the decade since Elevate?
Elevate, wow, that’s a blast from the past. I remember starting to construct Elevate, and I didn’t know anything; it was just this point of writing in sound. I was playing around with different sound samples and just loved mixing them and arranging them. So it was pretty basic. But some of those tracks told a story, too. They were miniature diary entries in sound. They all were. And the titles have some clues there. It was my way of discovering a way to communicate feelings back then I didn’t just want to post on social media.
Over the years, I worked on more electronic albums, and the compositions became more complex. I started to really be interested in piano compositions and fugatos and the nuances of mixing classical with electronic music. Sonically, I started to merge jazz and electronic with trap music early on and sort of got the sense that I enjoyed percussion naturally but couldn’t find a way to bring it into singer-songwriter albums yet. So I studied a bit more and found a space where synths could work well with classical piano compositions. And there’s an art to it, you know?
By the time Lovers Fair was written and recorded, I started to see a merging of the sound styles I started with and where I wanted to go, but it wasn’t where I wanted it yet. I think Halo was a breakthrough album for that. It could still be considered a stand-alone album for neo-classical composition. Those tracks were composed live on my piano and recorded live in one or two takes. So it has this mixtape feel with odd piano sounds that I really fell in love with. It was also the first album I could merge fairly well with synths and a bunch of other classical instruments and layers of sonic revelry.
Spiritus is a more mature work, where I found more confidence in balancing vocals against really complex compositions crossing all styles of music production. And that was fun, really wild. You know, taking these hybrid vocals that sort of hover and layering them over UK garage beats and synth-pop and neoclassical layers was super challenging but rewarding. I’m still not where I want to be production-wise, but it’s a start. For example, the vocals are purposefully hazy on some tracks, hidden in others, and clear as a bell in others. It’s all pretty purposeful. Now, after being about 28 albums in, I feel like I have more control over my “paintbrush,” so to speak, for music production, songwriting, and singing. But there’s still so much to learn.
“Crossed Our Hearts” had 20 layers of vocals lined up to the millisecond. I learned a lot about vocal production on that track. I’ve evolved to having my voice be an instrument and not the main focal point which can frustrate some listeners. But if you can go along with the sound and voice layering, it will make sense at the end of the album. I hope! Or I’ll have to evolve that space more too. I’m finding that secret sauce, I think. The way to compose that is truly you, no one else. Like a painter.
Given the ornate nature of the music, do you play live, and if so, what are the difficulties in bringing such a sound to the live environment?
I used to do pop-ups a lot over the past decade for family and friends. If I did perform my full set with all the instrumentals, well, I’d likely have to have a looper or a backing track for instruments and do the piano live. Or I’ve considered composing live like an EDM artist, just winging it with a poem I wrote. A lot of my recordings are at the first or second take, and I’d love to bring that experience to a crowd. I’d be open to it.
Ultimately though to pull off this album live, I’d have to have someone like Jacob Collier level performing too. Or an orchestra. I’ve converted my tracks to orchestral pieces and while very very complex, it would be cool to have an orchestra play with some electronic mixing done on my end live over vocals. Think Grimes and Jacob Collier & The New York Symphony combined.
Big question, but what would you say is the ultimate power of music?
The ability to transport a listener into an altered state of consciousness and have the experience not only be all encompassing but healing and life changing at the same time. I guess as a young girl, I saw the power of ancient hymns being sung weekly as a form of reverence and ritual as part of vespers service when I was at boarding school. Later on, I saw music as a form of escapism, a way to transport into a world that could help heal and process really complex emotions.
I’ve always enjoyed that part. There are also a handful of artists I admire, and I still remember when I first heard their song, which struck me like a chord. Those songs, those moments where your soul connects so deeply to a song, are just really reverent, too. I don’t think we understand yet how much music can help a listener process complex emotions and help them through anxiety or depression, grief, trauma, etc.
You also run Produced By A Girl. Can you tell me about that, its aims, who you represent, and in what ways?
Thanks so much for asking about Produced By A Girl! It’s close to my heart and legacy in the music industry. It’s a platform, community, and marketing company for female artists and producers. We provide positive press for artists, music distribution, and label services on our sister labels Produced by a Girl Records and Aurally Records. Produced By A Girl was formed when I was being mentored by an AR who was at UMG at the time on his sub-label. He challenged me to think about branding as an artist and see how I could help other women in the music industry.
I was just producing music at that time, and I couldn’t find other females who were producers very easily on social media, so I came up with the name Produced By A Girl, and the rest is history. I’ve met the most wonderful people through the music industry and primarily through PBG. It’s been a blessing and a part of the legacy to which I dedicated my music career. I also get the chance to share my deep knowledge of branding and artist development with the artists, so it’s been a full-circle experience.
Are there any artists you admire today and see as doing important work in the industry?
So many, but here are a few below that have absolutely captured my attention the past year and are ridiculously talented.
Alfonso Pudoto – In my opinion he’s the new Mozart of our generation. He sometimes plays on TikTok live and I had the privilege of viewing his practices. His music is deeply complex, futuristic and his piano compositions are beyond brilliant.
ooes – I think ooes is incredible and inspiring. She’s on my top ten for inspiring artists this year.
The National – Their music production is just out of this world and reminds me of some of Yan Tiersen’s work. I’m a fan.
Jacob Collier – Was lucky enough to see him live in Portland over the winter and was amazed. What a prodigy and bright soul. He’s another Mozart of our generation in my opinion and really contributing to the overall elevation of music composition in the music industry with his collabs with major artists.
Taylor Swift – Love TS. I mean, she healed the whole world on her Eras Tour. Queen behavior.
Enya – Forever an Enya fan. I really admire her way of humbly creating, healing the world and living in her castle with cats and not feeling the need to perform to mega crowds.
Jan Emanual Abras – my favorite contemporary composer. Brilliant for his approach to music and has deeply significant orchestral pieces that go so much further than the music. He’s healing the world too in his work.
And so, where next for you, and what would you like to see the next five years look like for yourself, your music, and the world in general?
Dave this has been such an immersive interview, thank you from the bottom of my Spritus heart. It’s rare I’m seen in a crowd with my music, and I feel seen here. So for the next adventure? I have a trilogy I’m working on currently. Spiritus was first in the trilogy. The next two albums are building off of Spritius into a world I’ve deemed ‘The Sunborn.’
‘The Sunborn’ are high-tech avatars that create a multiverse experience that combines music, tech, poetry, storytelling, and alternative therapy to help people heal through an immersive experience in media. The Sunborn characters have started appearing on socials, and you can catch them there, in their dystopian, utopian world of sunflowers, solar panels, and high-tech fashion with their paintings and music, of course. If you stay and watch, they’ll have an encouraging word for you too. Personally, I’d like to get over to Berlin and check out the art scene there. The world in general? I think I can safely say I hope it looks wildly different, healing, thriving, open borders – utopia; I think we can get there if we all use our healing gifts to help each other, right?
And thank you for such a detailed and fascinating look around your world. Best of luck with everything you are doing.
